How to Identify and Live in our Values

Values are like our North Star, they guide us through life in our actions and the decisions that we take on a daily basis. We often feel strongly when we see or hear something which goes against that for which we stand for – our values. And we feel at peace when we are are able to identify and live in our values. When our words and actions align, we are living with purity, righteousness and integrity.

 

Most people innately understand what values ‘feel’ like, but putting them into words and identifying them can be a little more challenging. The following activities are designed to help you identify those values which resonate most with you. There are no ‘right’ or ‘wrong’ answers, only what is most true for yourself.

 

Grab a notepad to write your answers on.

 

Step 1 – Understanding Values

 

1. What does the word ‘values’ mean to you?

 

2. How do your values influence your decision making?

 

3. How does it feel when you are acting outside of your values?

 

Step 2 – Identifying your Values

 

1. Review the list below, and identify 10 to 15 words which resonate deeply with you. Feel free to add your own, if necessary. Write these down on a separate notepad.

 

Accomplishment Accuracy Acknowledgement Adventure Authenticity Balance Beauty Boldness Calm Challenge Charm Collaboration Community Compassion Comradeship Confidence Connectedness Contentment Contribution Cooperation Courage Creativity Curiosity Determination Directness Discovery

Ease Effortlessness Empowerment Endurance Enthusiasm Environment Excellence Fairness Flexibility Focus Forgiveness Freedom Friendship Fun Generosity Gentleness Growth Happiness Harmony Health Helpfulness Honesty Honour Humour Idealism Independence

Innovation Integrity Intuition Joy Kindness Learning Listening Love Loyalty Optimism Orderliness Participation Partnership Passion Patience Peace Presence Productivity Recognition Resilience Respect Resourcefulness Romance Safety Self-Esteem Service

Simplicity Spaciousness Spirituality Spontaneity Strength Tact Thankfulness Tolerance Tradition Tranquility Trust Understanding Unity Vitality Wisdom   Add your own here

 

2. Take your list of 10-15 words and see if there are any other words that encapsulates a number of them. For example:

 

From this…	…To this
Collaboration Empowerment Loyalty	Community
Adventure Discovery Learning	Growth

 

See if you can whittle your original list of 10-15 words down to 3-5 words.

 

3. Now pick 2-3 values that stand out the most to you. Answer the following questions to help you decide:

 

• Which values stand out the most to me, intuitively?
• How will these values help me to make difficult decisions?
• What does it look like when I am living in these values?
• Which values bring out the best in me?

 

My core values are:

 

1_______________

2______________

3______________

 

Step 3 – Actions and Behaviours, Identify and Live in our Values

 

It’s one thing to spend the time and come up with a list of words of our core values; it’s quite another to live them. People and organizations often talk about their values, but they end up just being airy words with no real meaning and no tangible action behind them. When this happens, we (or the organization) lose integrity. One way to prevent this is to get very clear with ourselves not just what the values are, but what actions and behaviours we expect to see when someone is living with those values. The next exercise helps you to accomplish this.

 

Take each ‘core value’ and now think about what it looks like. What behaviours are you expecting to see? When you are at your best, what does this value look like in action? You can incorporate some or all of the original list of words that you picked up if this helps you define what the value looks like.

 

Example:

 

Value = Growth

 

What does it look like when I’m my best version of myself?

 

When I’m living in my ‘growth’ value, I am adventurous and curious. I am open-minded about trying new things and don’t let me fear get the better of me. I reserve my judgement before trying something new and adopt a ‘can-do’ attitude which allows me to experience it. My curious mindset enables me to discover new things so that I am constantly learning and growing. I ask questions in a respectful way in order to learn rather than outrightly dismiss.

 

Step 4 – Living in your Values

 

Living in your values takes daily work of both being conscious and present. The following questions are designed to help you reflect on what it looks like when you are living in your values and when you are not. Feel free to write your answers down on your notepad.

 

My core values are:

 

1_______________

2______________

3______________

 

1. What does living in your values feel like?
2. What are some decisions you’ve made or some actions you’ve taken that are in alignment with your values?
3. What do you feel the outcome is of living in your values all the time?
4. What are the risks of you living in your values at times?
5. What does it feel like when you are in conflict with your values?
6. What decisions have you made or actions that you have taken that challenge your values?
7. What is the outcome of living against your values?
8. What do you risk by living outside of your values?
9. Sometimes it’s uncomfortable to live in our values, for example, when we feel we have disappointed someone. What will you do to remind yourself of the consequences of not living in your values?
10. What commitment will you make right now to live in your values?

Many people know that having a moral compass of sorts is important and being able to identify and live in our values is a big step towards fulfillment. Taking the time to understand yourself will help you on your journey to leading a happier and more content life.